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The Plastic Spoon: Accidentally Vegan Chocolate Chunk Oreo Brownies

It has been a while. I haven’t posted a Plastic Spoon article since last year .LITERALLY! I apologize for my hiatus with my delicious food stuffs (at least I hope you all found them delicious [I find most things delicious {except bananas cuz F$%K bananas!}]). I was hard at work on organizing the first annual Gonzo Geek Pigskin Picks during the highly contested 2012 NFL season, but it was all worth it because I won (It was worth it for me at least?).

Since it’s a new year, I decided to show something entirely different from your resident chef and fat ass. In the past, I have railed against veganism (but not so much against veganism itself [more so just vegans and their condescending attitudes{Eating Soyrizo may mean you live ten years longer than I do, but I don’t consider what you do living!}]), but I met a girl. And she’s good people. And she’s a vegan. So as a challenge, I attempted to find ways to give her foodgasms without violating her code (not like the Code of Harry from Dexter [but VERY SIMILAR!]). But how can I possibly do that when my first article on this website was a recipe for a steak the size of my head? I had to get creative and do a bit of research on the interwebs.

I discovered that it can be easier than you think to prepare vegan dishes. I took a glimpse at the PETA website and found a list of food products that are “accidentally vegan”. This prompted me to take a short cut and prove how simple it can be to blow minds without eggs and dairy.

ACCIDENTALLY VEGAN CHOCOLATE CHUNK OREO BROWNIES

1 box of Duncan Hines Chewy Fudge Brownie Mix

½ cup Unsweetened Applesauce

1 tsp. Baking Powder

¾ cup Vegetable Oil

Ghirardelli Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips

Oreos

Vegan Butter (I used Earth Balance)

               That’s right! Duncan Hines Brownie Mix, Ghirardelli Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips, and Oreos are all accidentally vegan. That’s what makes this whole process so simple. Yes. There are ways to make vegan brownies from scratch, but chances are you won’t constantly have those ingredients on hand. This is a simple, stress free way to produce mouth magic. First, preheat your oven to the instructed temperature on the back of the box. Now, when you look at the back of that box, it’s going to tell you to put two eggs into the mix. Yeah….don’t do that. But because you’ve taken out your eggs, you’ve lost your binding agent (which is the thing in baking that holds everything together). Have no fear. That’s the purpose of the applesauce and baking powder. Add your water, vegetable oil, baking powder and applesauce to the dry ingredients from the Duncan Hines box. Mix until all the ingredients are wet. Toss in a couple of handfuls of the Ghirardelli chocolate chips for added chocolatey chocolateness chocofied goodness. Grease your baking dish with the vegan butter. Pour in half of the brownie mixture. Make sure it completely settles and covers the bottom of the pan. Place a single layer o fOreo’s on top of the brownie mixture and pour the remaining batter on top of those Oreo’s. Bake in the oven for the allotted amount of time. Very simple.

               Simple yet amazing. These brownies lose NOTHING in taste. Sure! If you have vegan friends, they’ll appreciate the extra effort you went to, but your nonvegan friends will never know the difference unless you tell them. They are extremely chocolatey. The added semi-sweet chips give it another layer of texture and the Oreo’s, while they lose a bit of their crunchiness from sitting in an oven for over half an hour, are still prevalent throughout nearly every bite.

               I’ve come to find the idea of turning certain tasty treats vegan to be a lot of fun.It turns into a little puzzle. “Well, this recipe has cream in it. How do I find a vegan way around that?” It’s a challenge (because guess what vegans! You aren’t better than me! I can do it, too!) It’s times like this that I think to myself “I could be vegan.” Then, I continue thinking to myself “But I just really love a great steak. Oh and fried chicken! And I really love sushi, too.And BACON!!!! Hmm…That’s all four meat groups. OH WELL!” I, however, have shown an ability to adapt. And in the wise words of one Robert “Rocky” Balboa, Sr. : “If I can change…and you can change…EVERYBODY CAN CHANGE!!”


Posted in: Gonzo
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