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Funko Rant: My Top Ten What The F**ks

Every now and then, you see someone ask about your ‘Funko Regrets’.  What pieces did you miss out on?  What did you sell to soon? What did you hold on to for too long?  You know, the kind of question that someone eventually answers with ‘Well, if I had a time machine….’ 

But you don’t. 

No one does.

So shut the f**k up, Donny.

Why kick yourself for not buying a Headless Ned Stark?  I could have bought a bunch at the booth one year, but I’m not into the show that much so I didn’t.  Do I regret it? No.  It didn’t ring my bell.  I didn’t buy it.  Life moves on.  Thinking back, there’s lots of stuff I could have bought but didn’t-  Metallic Cereal Monsters, Metallic Captain America, Loki.  I didn’t want them so I didn’t buy them. 

No harm. 

No foul.

No regrets.

Now, on the other hand, there’s tons of stuff that I DID buy that I ‘regret’, and I put ‘regret’ in parenthesis because it’s not quite the right word.  For the most part, I collect things because I like them, so I’m more apt to fall out of love with a purchase than regretting it. That’s not to say that I haven’t made a couple of WTF purchases over the years. Who hasn’t?  I mean, sometimes you go through a storage box, dust of a pop, and go ‘Really?  I bought Duck Dynasty?  When was I addicted to Benadryl?’

Shit collecting happens to all of us.

So here’s a funner question: what are your Top Ten WTF purchases?  What have you bought that has you scratching your head wondering if you’re a blackout collector?   

Here’s mine.

Emperor Calus Pop – Overwatch

I found this guy stashed away in one of my pop tubs.  And it scared me.  I’m not sure how I ended up with the Creep Toad.  I don’t play video games.  I don’t know who the character is.  I think I got him because he was the closest pop at hand during a ‘Buy two, get one free’ promotion at GameStop.  Or maybe he got put into my bag by mistake.  Anyway, I hate him and he was a bitch to get rid of.  He’s one of the heaviest pops I’ve ever hefted so after fees and the additional shipping it took to get him out of my collection, I think I might have sold him for a nickel.  Good riddance.

Blind Box Minis – Any Line

Goddammit! I know better, but I still buy minis off the shelf from time to time.  I don’t believe in weighing the boxes in the store, so I go by the shake test.  That’s where you shake boxes convinced you can tell which one is heavier, or moves around more, or sounds like a Forky.  Can’t tell you how many times I’ve ended up with the ‘other’ heavy mini, or with a whole bunch of ‘heavier, but not the heaviest’ pieces.  Also, 1/6 ratios are total bullshit. I think they should scan cheaper at the register because everybody has a Peter Parker and no one wants another one.  I know that your brain is constantly telling you that the next time will be different, but don’t listen.  It’s lying to you.  The way brains do.  Cherry pick the B/S/T pages and Ebay for minis.  Always.  Unless, of course, you’re 100% sure that the box you’re shaking is in fact the Glow Molten Man.  

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