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Funko Rant: dorbz. Dorbz. DORBZ!!!


Should I collect them?  

That question keeps popping up.  People see the FCBD frenzy and feel like they’re getting left behind.  Hate to miss out on the next Shadowtrooper just because they don’t like the toy.  There’s money on the table, man!!  Who wants to pass up on the next great flippable!

Should I collect them?

Absolutely.  According to Brian (JAFO’s ToyFair interview), Dorbz are selling better at this point in their life cycle -roughly a year- than Pops did in theirs.  It makes sense.  Pops started with a handful of licenses, and maybe released 50 or so figures (not counting variants and exclusives).  There weren’t that many stores that carried them and the ones that did had a habit of clearancing them out (Target, Disney).  Even when they did have an exclusive, it tended to stick around for a while.  Gemini and Toy Tokyo had 240 piece exclusives that sat on their websites for months. Months!  How long did it take a 500 pc Gruesome to sell out at the Funko Shop last Christmas?  An hour, maybe two?   Yep, 2012 (Pops’ breakout year) could not come soon enough.  

Thanks to the success of Pops, Dorbz has it waaaaay easier.  They’re in more stores, have a truckload of licenses to pull from, and they’ve already crossed the 100 figures figure.  Just about every Pops wave being released this year is accompanied by a Dorbz wave.  And check out those secondary prices for chases and exclusives.  $40 for a chase!  $150 for ECCC Freddy!   FCBD Dorbz?  Might as well change that to LTPM (License To Print Money) Dorbz.  Oh yeah, Dorbz are selling WAAAAY better than Pops.  Better jump on the bandwagon now.

So I should collect them?

Oooooh...maybe not.  On the flip side, there are rumors out there that they’re not selling well. That retailers are getting stuck with Dorbz inventories and refusing new product.  I believe that to be true as well.  Pops sell big time.  I’m sure more than one retailer figured they’d be sitting on a second gold mine if only a fraction of pop collectors bought into Dorbz.  Problem is, the majority of Pops collectors ONLY collect Pops.  Nothing else. That fraction of crossover collectors is more like a fraction of a fraction, taken to the nth decimal place.  Good luck turning those heads.  Stop me when you’ve heard one of these before:

Hikari - Why, when I can get 4 or 5 pops instead?  

Minis - How can I open the minis without destroying the value of the box?

Dorbz - They’ve got stupid faces, lack detail and are pretty limited with what they can do.  (Interestingly, the same thing wobbler collectors said about Pops.)

I guess we should take that ‘next big thing’ with a grain of salt.  Let’s all meet back here in 2017 and see how they’re doing then.

So I shouldn’t get them?

Only if you like them, which I now do.

In defense of the haters, I will say that Series One was pretty ‘meh’. When Funko showed them off at ToyFair last year, my initial reaction was ‘Hey, look!  A Mighty Mugg went and f**ked a Fisher Price Little Person!’   Yes, very classy, but such was the extent of my underwhelmment. I thought they were overly cartoony, the colors too bright and too primary, and the designs too simple.  Hell, the name is short for ‘Adorbz’ which is short for ‘Adorable’ which is long for ‘Cutesy’.  These were not made for the serious collector.  You know, the guy who lives in his parents’ basements and blogs about Funko.  BTW - I own my own basement.  I’m talking about others.

But they got better.  Every release since Series One has been an improvement.  Even though I’m one of a dozen of people who liked him, I thought Ultron was decent. Guardians of the Galaxy was a step up.  They don’t appear to sell worth a crap, but they still look nice.  TMNT were pretty cool. Couldn’t believe they did Horror Dorbz before more DC or Marvel, but ,omigod, those were great!  Leatherface was the first Dorbz I bought for myself.  

Loki was great.  Had to go back and get a Thor to go with.  


Fallout, nice.  Assassin’s Creed, nice.  Disney, nice.   

Batman V. Superman...hated the movie, but the Dorbz were decent.  

Civil War, amazing.  

Chase pieces and exclusives, AWESOME!   


I think you get the picture.  They’re getting better...or they’ve been hand dipping in heroin to make us think they’re better.  Whatever it is that Funko’s doing, it’s working.  We appear to be buying more.

A-ha!  So I should be getting them.

There’s a lot of hype surrounding Dorbz, and despite being a big fan, I think a large part of it is completely irrational and misleading.  Some people are afraid they’re missing out so they’re panic collecting.  “Gotta get this cheap before it becomes my super-expensive grail’.  Others have adopted the ‘buy them all to sell/trade for things I really want later’ approach that is leeching the fun out of collecting Pops.  Taking a scale to Hot Topic so you can weigh the boxes to ensure you get the chase/exclusive? C’mon!

Either way, both are treating Dorbz like Pops and they are not Pops.  Pops are lightning in a bottle.  Dorbz are more like thunder in jug or something.  Older Dorbz sell for 5 bucks on Ebay and people can’t give away the MCC/LOC pieces.  It’s only a handful of figures that give the impression that Dorbz are the NEXT BIG THING and what happens if everyone decides they don’t want those?

Yeah, exactly.

But even if they are over-hyped at the moment, I do believe they will become a thing and that they'll be around for a while. I don't think they'll be as big as Pops, but they'll end up a nice feather in the Funko cap.  They're cute and they display great.  I think they're kind of cool, even thought that smug smile they're all sporting wears on you a little.  Can't wait for the first frowny-faced Dorbz.  I'm getting that one purely out of spite.

Make up your mind, man, should I get them or not?

I dunno, let me ask you again if you like them?  

Yes?  Then buy them all.

No? Then go to Hot Topic and buy another pop.

BONUS FEATURE: Where Dorbz come from

Well, when a Mighty Mugg....

...and a Little Person....

...fall in love, they share a special 'Love Hug' (I think the godless public schools call this 'Bumping Uglies').

And nine months later, a magic bird delivers a special gift from the heavens.


...a special gift from the heavens.

And that's where Dorbz come from.

(Seriously, though.  Doesn't Cap look like he's from 1978?)
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