Its been quite a week in these here United States.
We've had landmark legal decisions.
We've had armed manhunts.
We've had flag burning.
Yes, it has been quite a week.
I've watched from the sidelines and marveled at the reactions to all of the above. They've been the usual wide spectrum of response - from informed to insane.
What I've noticed is that, as a result of our growing national desire that nobody be offended by anything...ever, we've lost the ability to have reasonable dialogue and reaction.
So, a dead-eyed, bowl-cut loner shot up a church. Do we address this person's mental state and/or the root of his hatred? No, we chum up the water with an jihad against a flag that hasn't flown in any meaningful way in over 150 years.
Yes, the stars and bars is the Confederate battle flag. Yes, the Confederacy was pro-slavery. Yes, slavery was bad. However, slave ownership in the 1800s is hardly the cause of this moron's shooting spree.
Neither was the flag.
Look, I'm a Southerner, born and bred. In fact, I've lived my entire life south of I-10.
My family is from Mississippi.
Someone way back on the family tree owned slaves.
I'm not a toothless backwoods bumpkin. I'm actually a pretty clever guy (or so I like to tell myself).
My family is not a bunch of hateful Klansmen. I was raised in a loving nurturing environment and taught to treat others as I would like to be treated.
I'm not proud of slave ownership, but not willing to (ahem) whitewash it like some folks (ahem...Ben Affleck).
It happened, but it is history. We learned from it, so we aren't doomed to repeat it.
What does all this mean? I'm really not sure other than I think the rush to eradicate the Confederate battle flag in response to a horrific act perpetrated by a single, damaged individual speaks more to our growing mob mentality than it does to any desire to do right.
There will be another tragedy. This one will fade. New senses will be offended.
Its the circle.
Truth? I owned a Confederate battle flag. It hung on my wall in my teen years.
You know why?
It had nothing to do with the Confederacy.
It had everything to do with the Dukes of Hazzard.
It had to do with car chases, exploding arrows and, of course, Daisy.
So, in an effort to heal our wounds, real or imagined, I present to you Catherine Bach.
Ms. Bach was featured prominently on Dukes. So prominently, in fact, that her shorts have been immortalized. An who among us - black, white, Northerner, Southerner, gay, straight, Christian or Jew - doesn't love to see a beautiful woman rock some Daisy Dukes?
I feel better already.
I'm sure I could continue my rant, but I'm going to let this picture take the place of my next 1000 words.
And, as a wise Southern man once said, that's all I have to say about that.
Let's hit the links.
Tips for heavier stoner tunes
Breakfast sushi?! *heavy breathing*
Ohpleaseohpleaseohplease let Hannibal kill people on Netflix!
Yvonne Strahovski rapping as Khalessi is THE MEANING OF LIFE!
Pete Rose is finally out of second chances
Horror villains who aren't as bad as they seem
What do WWE "superstars" do when they retire?
Fun facts about King of the Hill
Eddie Van Halen says David Lee Roth won't be his friend
And finally, exactly how much does it take to make a pair of Beats by Dre headphones?